“We are at our most powerful the moment we no longer need to be powerful.” ― Eric Micha'el Leventhal
How is this so?
Humans are essentially vulnerable creatures. We move through the world with fragile skins, fragile bones, and fragile egos.
We are breakable, and it is our very breakability that makes us human.
However, the modern world has conditioned us to hide our fragility, to put on a brave face. Many of us have been brought up in societies that encourage us to keep our emotions, our inner worlds, our deepest fears and desires under wraps.
We become accustomed to moving through the world wearing a mask, a mask that says “I’m fine”, “I’m good”, “I’ve got this." We’ve been taught to believe that if we show what is truly inside us, we’ll be ridiculed or taken advantage of.
But when we step into our vulnerability, we inhabit our true power.
When we stop trying to hide our humanness, we move out of fight-or-flight survival mode.
When we open our soft squishy insides, we lay ourselves bare, to receive life as it is right now.
Our ability to feel it all and not shut down or close off is our true power. To stay open to life.
In order for us to experience more depth and intimacy in the relationships, we must be willing to exchange our vulnerability. When we share what’s really at our cores, all of those parts that we try to hide can be brought into the light of day where they can be loved.
Intimacy (into-me-you-see) requires you to allow someone to really see into you.
This can feel exposing and scary. The nature of vulnerability is that it’s supposed to feel vulnerable - there is no easy way around it, there’s no way of not feeling the fear.
The very fact that it is scary is what makes it vulnerable.
So, if you feel like you struggle with being vulnerable with others - congratulations, you’re doing it right!
The key is to keep doing it.
Vulnerability creates space for more vulnerability; it opens doors; it drops the masks, softens shells, crumbles the walls that we’ve erected to protect ourselves and to keep ourselves from being truly known.
It softens the atmosphere and gives permission to others to open themselves.
Maybe you’ve noticed this; in times when you've shared something that feels deeply personal, shameful, or difficult to admit, perhaps you can recall that others were inspired to share their own vulnerabilities in your stead.
It’s a two-way street, a conversation; when you share your truth, the floodgates open. So it’s not just for you - your vulnerability is an act of service towards living in a more open world.
The divisions that keep us separate and at war begin to dissolve when we have the opportunity to see ourselves in one another. Greater empathy, a much-needed virtue in our modern world, creates a greater intimacy between people and planet.
At Lua, our mission is to create spaces where vulnerability is celebrated and encouraged, so that we can go deeper, quicker - within ourselves, and with each other.
As Brené Brown says in The Gifts of Imperfection,
“We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection.
Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them — we can only love others as much as we love ourselves.
Shame, blame, disrespect, betrayal, and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged, healed and rare.”
Ellowen is an Irish musician, priestess and warrior of Love, with a devotion to everyday creativity, landing temples and bringing Lua culture to the world through many magical mediums. Find her at @thisisellowen & www.ellowen.life
We never share your email address.